趣味经典英语笑话三则

下面是本站小编整理的趣味英语笑话三则，希望大家喜欢!

　趣味英语笑话：爱护动物

The owner of the hamburger stand was rather surprised to see a man walk in with threeiguanas, but when the man ordered fourhamburgers with fries, the owner complied with a shrug.

有个人牵了三只大蜥蜴走进一家汉堡店，老板吓了一跳。接着他点了四份汉堡和薯条，老板耸耸肩答应了他的要求.

The man and his iguanas enjoyed their dinner and left.

那个老兄和他的蜥蜴享受过晚餐后便离开了。

The next day the man returned with two kangaroos and the same scene was repeated.

第二天，那个人带了两只袋鼠，又点了相同的东西。

On the third day the man entered with two orangutans and a chimpanzee, and the owner couldn't help making a remark.

第三天，他带了两只红毛猩猩和一只黑猩猩。

"You certainly seem to be an animal lover," he said.

老板实在忍不住，便说：“您实在是个爱护动物的有心人。”

"That's true," said the man, "and I'd like you to know how much we appreciate your letting us eat here. Some proprietors object. "

“那倒是真的，”那位仁兄回答说道.‘‘另外我也要感谢你让我们进来吃晚餐，许多店老板都拒绝卖东西给我们。”

"That's quite alright," said the shopkeeper.

“没有问题啦!”店老板说。

"As a token of my appreciation, I’d like to give you this lobster. " And the animal lover handed over a live, wriggling crustacean

“为了向你表示谢意，我送你一只龙虾。”说着他便给老板一只活蹦乱跳的大龙虾。

"Well, that's very kind of you. My wife and I will have it for dinner. "

“您真好，我太太和我将以它当晚餐。”

"Oh, he-s already had dinner. But I am sure he-d love totake in a movie. "

“喔，它已经吃过晚餐了，但我想它会喜欢看场电影。”

趣味英语笑话：凡事总有例外

A musician had taken to heart the old saying, "Music hath charms to soothe the savage beast," and traveled to the darkest corner of Africa in an effort to prove it.

一位音乐家牢记一句格言在心： “音乐有安抚野兽心灵的魅力。”为了证实这句话，他前往非洲最深处的内陆丛林旅游。

No sooner had he begun to play his violin in a jungle clearing than it was full of savage beasts, swaying in rhythm and tapping their paws to thedelightful sounds.

在丛林的一块空地上，他一拉起小提琴，四处就挤满了各种猛兽，跟着旋律，拍着脚掌，手舞足蹈起来。

Suddenly, however, a huge lion emerged from the jungle,pounced on the violinist and made a hearty meal of him.

可是丛林里突然跑出一头大狮子，扑向小提琴家，把他当作盛餐吃掉了。

The other animals cried out in dismay, 'Hey! We were enjoying that. "

其他野兽大失所望，说道：“我们正在欣赏音乐哩!”

"Eh?" said the lion, cupping its hand to its ear.

“呃?，’狮子弯曲手掌成杯子状靠着耳朵说道。

趣味英语笑话：我懂了

Mr. Beans had always wanted to travel to the African jungle to hunt, and, to his mind, the greatest prey was beyond doubt the mightygorilla. Unfortunately, the gorilla is an endangered species, and may no longer be killed for sport, but Mr. Beans had heard of oneprofessional hunter who had devised a way to capture the gorilla alive.

奔驰先生总想到非洲打猎，在他看来，壮硕的大猩猩无疑是最佳的狩猎对象。不幸的是，大猩猩乃是一种濒临绝种的动物，不适合娱乐性质的狩猎活动，但奔驰先生曾听闻一位发明可以活捉大猩猩的职业猎人.

One fine day found Mr. Beans talking to the great white hunter, Mr. Bones, in his tent.

一天，奔驰先生和伟大的白人猎物专家朋驰先生在帐篷中谈话。

"Well, if you want to go on safari, my services will cost you $ 1,000 , my man Mbulu $ 500 a day, $ 500 for the schnauzer and $ 500 for the pygmy with the gun," explained

Bones.

“如果你要去猎大猩猩的话，我本人服务一天索价一千美金;我手下恩布鲁一天五百美金，德国猎犬一天五百美金;另外带枪的矮黑人也一天五百，”朋驰解释说道。

Beans did not quite understand these charges, but nonetheless agreed.

奔驰先生并不很了解这些价目，可是他仍然答应了。

On their very first day on the hunt, Bones spotted a gorilla, which scampered up a tree. Mbulu, a mighty Zulu, pursued the ape and shook the branch on which it clung till the beast fell off. Immediately the schnauzer leapt forward, biting the befuddled ape on the most tender part of its anatomy. The gorilla fainted with shock, and was easily captured.

第一天出去打猎，朋驰看见一只猩猩逃到一棵树上，恩布鲁是一位孔武有力的祖鲁人，他追赶到树上，猛力摇动那只猩猩攀附的树枝，待猩猩掉下之后，猎狗立刻跳上前去，咬住它身体最柔嫩的部分，猩猩惊吓得昏了过去，很容易就被活捉了。

Mr. Beans was quite delighted, and even more so the next day, when the performance was repeated. But he still couldn ’t figure out the purpose of the pygmy with the gun, for whom he was paying $ 500 a day, and who seemed only to smile and pick his teeth.

奔驰先生非常高兴，尤其第二天又捕到另一只猩猩，更让他欣喜万分，但他还是想不通他每天付五百美金请的带枪的小黑人.

Finally, on the third day, Bones spotted the largest gorilla they'd ever encountered. As before, Mbulu pursued the primate into the tree. But this time, no amount of shaking would dislodge the beast. In fact, it turned on Mbulu,grappled with him, and sent him hurtling to the ground.

第三天时，朋驰看见他们所遇到的最大的一只猩猩，如以往一样，恩布鲁把那只灵长类动物追赶到树上，可是这次怎么也摇不下来。相反地，它转向恩布鲁，一阵扭打后，把他扔到地上去。

As the mighty Zulu fell, he shouted to the pygmy, "Shoo tthe dog! Shoot the dog!"

恩布鲁跌下时，他对矮黑人叫道： “快射那只猎狗!射那只猎狗”