如何管理容易哭泣的员工（上）
Most managers feel uncomfortable when employees cry during business conversations. Many of us may recall a time we’ve cried at work, but for some people it’s not a rare occurrence. Some individuals seem to react excessively to disappointment or challenge, with repeated bouts of apparent sadness or fear accompanied by tears, shaking, or reddening. If you manage someone who tears up easily, you may find yourself leaving important topics or issues unaddressed to avoid upsetting them.
大多数管理者都对员工在商务对话中的哭泣行为感到厌恶。我们可能会回忆起自己为工作哭泣的时候，但对于一些人来说不是罕见的事情。似乎有些人对失望或挑战反应过大，常常出现明显的伤心情绪或恐惧，伴随眼泪，颤抖或脸红。如果你管理某个很容易哭泣的人，你可能会发现你把重要的话题或事务搁置，从而避免打击他们。
Some employees are quick to cry because they lack strong self-management skills; they may be embarrassed by their own emotionalism, and grateful for any advice you can offer on keeping a more even keel. Some cry as a form of deflection or manipulation; I’ve worked with a handful of people whose frequent crying served as a first line of defense against criticism. Of course, they may also be handling a tough situation in their personal lives – from illness to difficult family situations. And perhaps the most positive reason for crying occurs when your employee trusts that you have the kind of boss-subordinate relationship where tears are nothing to hide or be ashamed of.
有的员工很容易哭泣，因为他们没有强大的自我管理能力；有可能因为他们被自己的情感主义羞辱了，或者感激你能够提供的更公平的支撑。有的人因为失衡或管理能力而哭；我曾与许许多多常哭的人共事，他们的哭泣行为是他们对批评的第一道防线。当然，他们还可能在处理着许多个人生活中的艰难问题——从疾病到艰难的家庭情况。并且很可能最积极的哭泣理由会在你的员工信任你有一个老板—下属直接的关系，这时候眼泪就不应该被压抑或感到羞耻。
You can’t know what’s going on inside your employee’s head, or whether they cry because they trust you, are trying to manipulate you, or happen to be overwhelmed by personal issues outside of work. If the issue is personal, you may want to refer them to your HR department or your company EAP, so they can get some additional support. Regardless of the cause of their distress, though, you’ll need to find a way to work around – or through – their tears. These six steps will help you and your subordinate keep a humane and professional focus on the work that still needs to get done.
你不知道你的员工在想什么，或者他们的哭泣是否因为出于对你的信任，都在试图操控着你，或刚好被工作以外的个人生活所侵袭。如果这个问题是私人的，你可以把他们介绍到人力资源部门或你的公司的员工帮助计划中，这样他们就能获得更多的支持。不管他们的压力来源是什么，你还需要找到方法处理他们的眼泪。以下的六个步骤能够帮助你以及你的下属保持一种人性以及专业的工作专注力，那些都是仍需贯彻落实。
1.Don’t overreact to the stimulus of crying. 1. 不要对哭泣的刺激物过度反应。
Face the employee and keep your body language open and your language neutral; show that you’re paying close attention but not becoming distressed yourself. This is a time not to be empathetic and try to experience what they’re feeling, but to be compassionate and take action because you see that they’re having a hard time.
直面员工，保持肢体语言开放，语言中性；展示你在密切关注着对方但不会感到沮丧。这是一个不表达同情心的时候，尝试感受他们的感受，也要有同情的感觉，行动起来，因为你看到你们正在经历着困难的时刻。
2. Note the trigger. 2. 注意到触发器。
Rather than asking why the employee is reacting, which can encourage a deep exploration of aggravations and hurt feelings, try to name the concrete, proximate cause: Say something like, “I can see that something just upset you. Was it….?” You want to start out by naming it without delving into it.
与其问一名员工为何反应这么激烈，这会加剧愤怒与伤心的感觉，倒不如直接说出明确的、最接近的原因：比如这么说“我知道有些事情打击了你，是不是……？”你希望自己开头说出这件事，而不是钻牛角尖。
